Thursday, December 13, 2012

Into the Art Room and...Down the Rabbit Hole

Recently my school had our bunkasai, which translates to culture festival. The kids all get together and practice singing songs, playing the koto, displaying projects and cool stuff like that. I'd like to share with you one of the parts I liked the best: The Terror Gallery of Dadaism. Well, it's actually just a gallery of my kids' art, but taken out of context and supplied with misleading commentary, I think it's actually pretty funny/cool, too. Since I don't know all the cultural cues, and can't read the captions, and also because the minds of middle school kids are capable of literally anything, it was quite a roller coaster ride for me.




 

What's the crown prince of the Second Egyptian Republic doing standing beside that brick wall with a giant target on his head? Why, he's thinking of eating beef, of course!
Is she the one who keeps killing me in Call of Duty...? :/This piece, appropriately titled "M16A4", is probably more a commentary on how Americans are viewed the world over. I alternate between feelings of shock, wonder and amusement as I gaze upon this automatic firearm situated proudly in front of the billowing American flag. It should also be noted here that this student also wrote M16A4 on her satchel, so it actually might just be her fascination with the M16A4 and it's home, America.  But I like to think people regularly confuse me with Rambo anyway.
 
What's up with these kids and guns? But this is actually what happens if you litter in this country. I had a similar reaction as the blue-haired girl when I dropped a gum wrapper and was immediately fired upon by gunslingers. It was a lucky thing that I had my M16A4 at hand.
 
Hooooooly crap. And I'm done looking at this nightmare fuel. Welcome to the Galaxy of Terror.
 
This isn't much less scary. This must be Smokey the Bear's grizzled cousin, Smokem the Zombie Destroying Panda. I only assume that out of frame he's holding a chainsaw and/or his boomstick. By the way, some of these zombie things seem very Munchian for some reason...
 
.....Hm. Maybe not.
 
 
And here is multicultural Bob Ross face-punching the crap out of Saturn while a chick emerges from his hair. Actually, if you look at it he DOES have a body, but for a long time I thought it was just a picture of a disembodied, unaffected planet destroying head. Not that there's anything wrong with that, either.
 
And I guess this would be what it might look like if some of Mr.Roger's puppets, a snake and Ronald McDonald had a battle royale over Britain's famous Big Rock Candy Mountain. They're really gonna Godzilla England. Not all of London! And that's either a really BIG bush in the bottom left or disorienting depth of field. Speaking of Ronald...
 
 
To the left you'll see Ronald McDonald sliding down a McDonald's pole. To the right you'll see Mario doing the same thing on his flagpole. I see what you did here, but I don't understand the WHY. But... it doesn't even seem weird anymore.... what's happening to me....?
 
 
Clearly, big brother is watching. Also, maybe it's just the road cone,  but this really looks like something from early 80's Devo. Does anyone else get that? Those hats from Whip It reminded me of road cones.  Weird times. Not that I was alive or anything, that's just what I've heard. Also, his hands and posture seem to suggest dance.
 
This is probably the last thing you'd ever see before your spaceship flew into the sun. Or was eaten by the sun. Or whatever a sunface like this does. I imagine eating is pretty hard with teeth of that magnitude.
 
 Now here's a cute pallete cleanser. Five bucks says Sunshine drew this. This seems so.... Sunshine. It's just a cute picture of a girl hanging some stars on a tree, or picking them from the star tree. Now, if I can only unsee that clown staring down those trapped tiny bears...
 
We all had a blast walking through the gallery and checking out everyone's art. In addition to this, they drew pictures of thier shoes (remember when we used to draw a bowl of fruit?), and some kids even sculpted stone, which is wicked. There was also some photography on display, and this little optical trick:
 The pictures are slightly cut and raised like a pop up book so it gives them a neat 3-D effect (Which is lost in my dumb pictures). It's like a diorama but cooler somehow.
 
Anyway, I'm always so surprised at how skillful my kids are at drawing and making art. I may give them trouble for the subject matter, but the fact remains they are LEAGUES ahead of me in talent--or at least execution. In fact, most of them write English better than me. So here's to you, kids, and the bright (and sometimes white-knuckle) artistic future we're all marching into together!

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